I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I still have a little drunk in my system
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Randomize