i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Randomize
