We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
