You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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