Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
