Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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