is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
