you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
