my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Randomize
