better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
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