I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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