Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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