That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
How external is "for external use only"?
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
