new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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