My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Randomize