we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
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