OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
