guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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