You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
