Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize