evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
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