Having a random hookup so left but love u
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize