That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
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