I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Randomize
