butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
