About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
