Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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