Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
and she was petting her beer can
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
It's never too late to be topless.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Randomize
