At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Randomize
