honey bunches of taint.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I need water and some morals
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
