Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
