I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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