At least make sure they are 18
Why
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize