Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Randomize
