Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Shame - the story of my life.
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