dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
she peed on how many people?
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
is it fun? or sober?
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
