I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
