k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize