I just cut my nipple shaving
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
My liver just had a heart attack.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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