I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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