I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
This baby is an asshole
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
