I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Randomize
