is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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