I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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