oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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