Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
i think i just lost a toe
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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