i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
