No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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