Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
