do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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