I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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