I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
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